So they then view sex as a chore

So they then view sex as a chore

So they then view sex as a chore

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Lynne Silva-Breen, LMFT

Would help if I was gone more often? After 22 years of marriage I find her as desirable as I’d did when we were 20. And I tell her constantly. But it never helps

Aussie dad

I know how you feel. Now I just live there and do what I want and say once the kids are grown get a divorce and just use brothels they are cheaper


I COMPLETELY agree with your article! You bring up so many great points! The following statement you made was spot on.

“Women want a commitment because it signals they are uniquely desired. But once a commitment has been made, your guy is stuck and the meaning of commitment changes. In women, desire e extent as it is in men by novelty and excitement and a stranger thinking they are hot.”

I am totally experiencing this myself at the moment and reading articles relating to this, aside from therapy, have been very therapeutic. It helps to know that you are not the only one going through a certain issue… Only in my case, I’ve lost desire not because I wanted to, but because he lost the desire first. Now it’s more exciting to me when I know another man desires me because at home I feel like I am completely undesirable.

It’s hurtful to be rejected so many times and the only times he wants you, you have to say “no” because you are just too disconnected. Everything else is “the same” through… Very routine… And I think this is the main problem. I would however like to see more articles relating to men losing their desire as this does not only happen to women, but men as well.

James Finley, Phd–retired psychologist

Let’s consider another physical feel-good activity-a back rub. Receiving a rub once or twice a week would probably continue to feel good and be desired indefinitely. Giving this might get boring and tedious if it’s not reciprocal. And even if reciprocity is in place questions arise: Why am I not getting as good a rug as I’m giving? Can I tell her I don’t feel like getting/receiving a rub today? Wonder why he didn’t say he enjoyed it last night? Is she bored with me and would rather be rubbing somebody else’s back?

I think that the issue here is that women are conditioned either by society or by biology to be sexually turned off by their committed partner. As u say when they have hooked their man, what that means is once the pursuit has gone. However according to Michelle Langely women in fact cease having sexual desire with their partner because after a while the honeymoon phase ends and the feelings go. Women are in fact less not more able to commit to Long term relationships sexually because once the chemical excitement ends they simply say I don’t love or fancy him any longer. Women also think that they are naturally monogamous when they are no more so than men so when the feelings go and they then fancy another man they chase the nonsense of ‘the one’ propagated by messages intrinsic in or example ‘chick flicks’. Monogamy is a challenge for both sexes but the evidence suggests that’s its women and not men who struggle more.

Miss ME

Gary, I think you are totally right. You got into most of woman’s heads so deep, you deserve some congrats.We complain about man beeing too sexually active, but they are comminted somehow, they still desire their woman most of the time. But for woman once she starts to think she is married and everything is going to take place in the same bed, it’s crazy boring . Same touches, same things, when physical passion dissapears,can get dangerous because you see cristal clear that he is fantasizing about porn screaming and you are about a new romance. He is probably wondering why you dont act like that and you why he isnt as exciting as your fantasies. A friend told me once she was fatesizing about another good looking man even if he doesnt exist, never stoping, but beeing in an almost ended relationship. It’s this hope that never dies, that’s what made me think inside we might be more alike than we want to accept. We might understand that we got ourselves in a big whol, but at least we can dream, read romances etc 🙂 and they can hear everytime we are not home. I’m gonna reconsider the never get late thought :)) Miss ME

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